I have become acquainted with people from all walks of life during my time online. What I never expected was the revelation that one of those friends was the owner of a now-defunct online adult toy store. He was clearing the attic out one day and discovered a couple of boxes of old stock. I logged on to our mutual forum to find him offering free goodie boxes to his friends. First come, first served. Well, what's a girl to do? Free is free, right? And everything needs renewing from time to time, doesn't it? So we conversed a little by email and he arranged to send the box by courier so that it would arrive, in plain packaging, on a Saturday. The doorbell rang at about 2pm and I signed for the box. It was heavy and I also noticed that it was sealed with ' Screwfix ' branded tape. " You sarcastic, sod, Andy! " I sniggered under my breath. It was uncharacteristically quiet in our house so I prepared...