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The Story Of The Communal Microwaves

This is a strange tale.  It is the tale of two microwaves and other electrical equipment in a communal kitchen.


Once upon a time, a tall, dark, less-than-handsome man showed a young lady and her older companion around a block of offices.  The young lady and her older companion were invited to the Smallest Rooms in the building but were assured that down the long dark corridor lay a Room Of Treats.  This very special room housed a water boiler, a water cooler, two microwaves and two toasters.  All the electrical appliances that one could wish for, especially when such modern technology was BANNED from the Smallest Rooms in the building.

Over the years, the young lady and her older companion acquired a couple of new friends and allowed them to share their Room Of Treats.  They also found out that the less-than-handsome man had told a number of other people about the Room Of Treats.  This did not matter for the young lady and her companion were kindly souls who liked to share in their good fortune.

The two microwaves were Very Special Microwaves.  One of the microwaves had the ability to communicate with the young lady, her companion and their friends through an extraordinary medium.  It could write secret messages for them to read.  The second microwave had been claimed by The Evil People.

The young lady, her companion and their friends did everything they could to keep The First Microwave happy - they cleaned it, kept it company whilst it was working and chatted to it during communal break times but they soon discovered that The Evil People in Other Parts Of The Building wanted to claim it for themselves so they could own all The Microwaves.  They could not see the secret messages that The First Microwave wrote and so The Evil People took The First Microwave but forgot to leave a ransom note.  The Second Microwave plotted a protest.

The Second Microwave disconnected itself from its power point and locked itself away in a plastic pencil case, poised like Houdini, ready for escape at an appropriate time.  It waited, and waited, and waited.  The young lady, one of her friends and one of the Evil People discovered the Special Microwave and thought that it was going to suffocate so BROKE the plug out.  The Secret Microwave was ever so grateful and gasped its gratitude whilst spinning and heating.

The young lady, her friend and the Now Not Very Evil Person went back to their Small Rooms very pleased that The Second Microwave had been saved.  The friend left work for the day and wished the young lady well.  The young lady decided that she needed to get a glass of water from the water cooler.

Suddenly, the young lady realised that The Second Microwave had disappeared along with The First Toaster.  When questioned, the Second Toaster refused to speak, obviously traumatised at what it had witnessed and very distraught at being left behind.  The Water Cooler denied all knowledge of anything.  The young lady did not know what to do and has to find a way to break the news to her older companion and her friends on Monday morning.

The moral of the story is this.  Electrical Items know their place and we should  never assume that communal equipment is actually for the use of the community because Evil People will always believe otherwise.

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