Blognonymous : Tantrums

This post was submitted to me within the ethos of Blognonymous.  This contributor has requested the Blognonymous platform because she wants and needs advice but doesn't feel able to ask openly on her own blog.  This is a mum at the end of her tether.  

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My son’s behaviour has been difficult since he was 18 months old. At that age we believed it was the dreaded Terrible Twos. He is now 4 and his behaviour has become far worse. He’s out of control and I’m at the end of my tether.

Sometimes he can be the most polite, helpful & delightful child but mostly he is a monster. I am constantly walking on eggshells around him, wondering what will cause the next blow up and how long it will last.

We spoke to our GP a few months ago as I could take no more and was having panic attacks. He has been referred to paediatrics and we have seen a variety of professionals but don’t seem to be getting anywhere. I never expected things to happen overnight but after days like today I don’t know where to turn.

My son started this morning off by punching, kicking and stamping on me at preschool, all while I was trying to calm him down as I couldn’t leave him in the state he was in. He lashed out at his younger brother by kicking at the buggy, thankfully hitting the frame and not his brother. The preschool staff don’t know what to do with him. I don’t know what do with him.

I’ve been trying everything that has been suggested to us but to no avail. I can be exceptionally patient with him, according to others but nothing seems to get us past these ‘tantrums’.

I left preschool and was in tears. I cannot go on like this and I’m regularly thinking of leaving. If it wasn’t for my other children I would just pack and go. I consider abandoning him somewhere. I consider calling in someone to just take him away from me. At times, those REALLY bad times, I hate him. I want him out of my life and I want him dead. No mother should feel that way or say that about her child. I just cannot take any more of it. He is ruining my life and the life of the rest of my family. I am constantly exhausted by either dealing with him or trying to keep him happy and keeping the rest of the family happy.

I do love my son but I can’t live like this any more.